Active Listening for Successful Communication

It seems counterintuitive, but the best communicators usually are very good listeners.

There are two types of listening, passive listening and active listening. Passive listening entail only some of your attention, with the occasional "uhuh" being thrown in from time to time. Active listening, on the other hand, is hard work and you will find that it really is the best tool for managing all sorts of communicational situations.

There are three aspects to active listening-
1. Paraphrasing the speaker's words without agreeing with him/her or being selective or manipulative. You do this by saying "It seems...(you repeat the last 3 or 4 words or the gist of his words)";
2. Inquiring by asking open ended questions to the speaker's statements such as "How would ....have helped you achieve...?"
3. Acknowledging any underlying feelings or emotions by empathizing (not sympathising). Empathy does not mean you are agreeing, but you acknowledge their sentiments.

See how active listening can be used in negotiations to uncover the other party's underlying interests.